I know what i want.You know why i said 'confused' is that i have confronted this guy with exactly what you said.He bluntly told me that it is a lie.He said that if i disappear,then i am a big coward.That if i love him i will stand and compete.I have never competed for a man before and i am not ready to do that now.My brother told me that there is nothing wrong with a man widening his choices,after all he is not asking for sex.Well what do i expect,they are friends.
Chinyere, i just have to repeat what some of the blogger have said, "you dont know what you want". No intent insult please, im just relating, so pardon me if i insult you. This guy is smooth. The way you have already fallen for him is just the same way other ladies have. He knows it and he is in charge of your decision, and all he needs is just a little push and you will open up your treasure jar. You might be lucky because of your brother, whom i guess is your intercessor and protector from this smooth talker lion-man. Any man in "love" dont keep an open relationship(s). Having multiple girlfriends only shows that he is not ready for commitment. Having "many" means he doesnt care if you stay or go and nothing you do or say bothers him because you occupy no space in his brain or heart. Lets cut the sermon short, if you really "like" this guy ask your brother (who knows him) what his friend want. Thats one way to know what he is made of. All you need after your break up is a comforter who this guy is doing for you and im afraid you dont love him. You have loved the way he sympathizes with you and his readiness to be there for you whenever you want to talk. Its an easy "job" to do, and many guys will tell you that that is the easiest way to get into a woman's brain, turn her to friend-with-benefits. Please, you dont love this guy and i want you to get that into your inner self. He doesnt love you either, maybe just yet. It takes a long time to develop LOVE. My opinion is that love is not a sudden effect, it doesnt come as a speed of light rather it develops gradually, grow like a seed, pass through nursery and all that...the result is what we called Love after it shows to the public. You will know his real reaction when he sees you with another guy.