IF ANIMALS HAD Facebook, THESE ARE MOST LIKELY TO BE THEIR STATUS UPDATES:

Cockroach: "My Friends pls help me to thank God cos I managed to skip from someone's footstep!

Cat: "My 7th child is asking who's her dad...What shall I tell her? I don't even remember!

Mosquito: I'm HIV positive..this is all due towrong Sucking!

Chicken: If tomorrow I'm not updating my status, it means am being served at
'MR BIGGS'... Love U all!

Octopus: I've just refilled my ink!...hurray!

Pig: Ohh gosh! They throw gossip that I'm spreading flu...wtf!

Goat: Friends! Don't go out...EID holiday is coming!

Pig comments on goat'sstatus: "Luckily, I'm HARAM = 5 likes.

Goat replies: "Don't u remember dat after EID is the Chinese new year?

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